Monday, October 8, 2012

How to Go Trick-or-Treating as a 19-Year-Old Woman

*note: this is not "How to be a 19-year-old woman for Halloween," but rather "how to be 19 and be able to pull off trick-or-treating."*

Halloween 2011: I, a 19-year-old college student, sat alone in my apartment contemplating what I should do for Halloween. I wasn't invited to any parties. I was to young to go out and drink. I had a baby face that made people ask "What high school do you go to, sweetie?" Actually... That still happens to me.

So I figured "What the hell? I'm gonna go trick-or-treating!"

I did my best to disguise myself. I put in everything white in my entire closet, which resulted in a minimization of my feminine curves, painted my face red and then half-washed it off, painted my eyes black, and brushed my hair in front of my face. It was probably the cheapest and one of my scariest costumes.

Basically, the key points are this:

1. Put some effort into your costume.

The thing that really makes people mad is when teenagers just put on a mask, push little kids out of the way, and fill their pillowcases to the brim with candy. Put some effort into your costume so that you're not lumped in with those guys. People feel a little better giving candy to someone that looks like they take the holiday seriously.

2. Cover up (or diminish) signs of your mature body.

No one's going to give you candy if you're dressed as a "sexy" anything.

3. Hide your face if you have any tell-tale signs that you're a little too old for this.

My vertical labret piercing is a sign that either my parents are very liberal or I'm old enough to go get it by myself.

4. If you can, go with other people.

Going by yourself looks a little strange.

5. Be respectful.

Remember what I said about those guys that put on masks and decide to be dicks on Halloween? If you're going trick-or-treating and you're older, use the other Golden Rule: Don't Be a Dick. Let little kids get their candy first. Say "thank you" to the people passing out candy. Don't cuss. If you scare a little kid really, really bad, apologize. I scared this one little girl so bad that she started crying. Her parents were mad until I went up to her, pulled back my hair and said "See? There's nothing to be afraid of. I'm just a normal girl in a costume. I'm very sorry if I scared you." That made her feel better and her parents thanked me for doing that for her. People are not as intolerant towards you if you're kind and respectful.

6. Don't let a few haters ruin your fun.

Yeah, I ran into a few houses that refused to answer the door because I wasn't a little kid. That sucked. What people don't understand is that there's not much to do when you're too old to go trick-or-treating, but too young to do anything else. Would they rather that I go out and make trouble? Get busted at a party for underage drinking? I'd rather just give the older kid a piece of candy than have them do something else.

That being said, if you're having fun, those haters can suck it.

I ended up having a really fun night and I came back home with lots of candy. If you want to go trick-or-treating, don't let anyone stop you!

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